"I do it myself!" We've all heard our toddler say something along these lines, or maybe it was just some toddler in the grocery store. That breech and stretch of freedom mixed with a mild dose of attitude. And while it's easy to laugh it off as the toddler's obviously poor coordination overtakes them amidst their stubborn nature, their words hit like a spreading epidemic in our culture.
Have you noticed the commercials? Have you noticed the expectation shift?
Kids are portrayed more and more in sitcoms, comedies, kid's shows, and commercials as rebellious individuals. And we laugh at the irony and somehow have trained ourselves to find the humor in the rebellion. I think it started somewhere as a "help me" laugh. You know, one of those laughs that is almost a plea asking the fellow participant to intervene. One of those partially embarrassed laughs.
I'm finding, through the joy of raising a toddler, that many kids are getting stuck in their toddler stage. Every kid has a wonderfully selfish side - welcome to the Fall-out, right? But there is a difference between autonomy and rebellion. Our culture has seemed to laugh where the lines have gotten muffled.
It's like that familiar saying, "things just aren't like they used to be." While progress is a good thing, slowly spiraling out of control is (clears throat) less desirable.
The kids shows now highlight and exemplify the role model as the one who has the sarcastic come-backs. Glamorizing the ability to cut someone else down with your words and rebel. So what's the result? Those pre-teen attitudes get themselves trapped in admiring first-grade bodies.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Calm Expectations
I have heard recently that my children are mellow. And I would like to explore the concept of a mellow child.
Many can attribute mellow to a child's genetic disposition. Or is mellow an environmental creation? Or is mellow a sign of a child's understanding of predictability - for if a child understands what is expected of them and what will come next then where is the nervous anxiety or concern?
I think my kids have a bit of all of these. Though I must note that my kids have their rambunctious moments too. But I am blessed to have learned early the value of being strict with your kids. Being strict does not mean lacking love, just being clear in expectation. This is hard to describe to a by-stander. It's hard to explain to them that your child cannot have the juice because you already told her 'no' and giving in to her crying, no matter how pathetic or no matter how much your heart breaks and thinks about 'just this time', teaching consistency is a far greater skill. No, people, being a Nazi about life is not the answer either. Don't think that my kids won't ever get ice cream or enjoy the freedom of yelling at the top of their lungs during play. But yelling at the top of their lungs in the car is not going to cut it, Boundaries create predictability. Predictability creates stability. Stability creates a calm child.
I guess when it boils down to it I just don't want to live in a constant state of chaos. I don't want to live in chasing down a toddler because running through the parking lot is an option. Introverted me would explode without some quiet around the house - and quiet is a loose definition with 2 of your own kids and 1 you watch throughout the week.
I am blessed by a toddler that enjoys quiet play as well as noisy play. Our mornings here are pretty quiet, with Abi napping, and Rachael usually looking at books, silently pulling a pull-toy in the hallway, and spending some Mommy-time laughing at the jack-in-the-box's flailing arms when you try to stuff him in. Rachael knows what to expect - each morning she's asked to play quietly if she wants to be in the room while I put Abi to sleep, and she prefers to be with us. Then Rachael knows that Abi sleeping means that she needs to be quiet in the hallway, but can feel free to be loud and play in the living room or the playroom or the fireside room. But Rachael has learned the difference between playing loudly and playing recklessly. And I am sincerely thankful to God that my efforts to help Rachael with her self-control, by creating boundaries, have created a very well-mannered (though she odes have her moments) and responsive child. She's still a toddler, people, and no I'm not the baby whisperer (that's my father-in-law), but predictability and clear expectation go for MILES.
Abi, on the other hand, is a more entertainment driven child. Her nature is to desire you to entertain her, or a toy that has movement and entertainment over a quiet toy. Knowing this about her character, though, does not mean she is constantly entertained. She, too, is expected to provide her own entertainment while playing on the floor beside my laundry folding, etc. And while she is more fussy about it at times, she has come into the same ability to self-entertain with understanding of the expectation. Now seriously, people, she's only 8 months old, I'm not asking her to self-entertain for 40 minutes, but age-appropriately I am asking her to self-entertain. And once she understands the expectation (though sometimes Abi is much more stubborn than my Rachael), she too finds enjoyment in the clear boundaries.
I love them for their differences, but the expectation has not changed. How I teach them the expectation is unique to the child, but I try hard to be as consistent with my expectation and keep my end-goal desire in mind. It's not about control. It's about wanting to enjoy the ride of life. It's about wanting to make a home that is welcoming and comfortable for all. It's about wanting to raise my kiddos to enjoy life and get the most from the moment while still learning the values of respect, and honor because of Jesus wanting us to respect and honor each other.
Please hear my heart here... I'm not bragging. God has RICHLY blessed me in the obedience and the approach to teaching self-control and obedience to my kids. And I have a LONG way to go in upbringing kiddos to honor Christ. God is constantly reshaping me and remolding me to honor Him more and more with my family. To God be all the glory for the successes of my little family. I just want to come to Him holding out my family and be able to say, "I tried hard to run after You with these kids. My offering is so insufficient but I give it to You."
What are some ways you give your family to Jesus, no matter how big or small your family?
Many can attribute mellow to a child's genetic disposition. Or is mellow an environmental creation? Or is mellow a sign of a child's understanding of predictability - for if a child understands what is expected of them and what will come next then where is the nervous anxiety or concern?
I think my kids have a bit of all of these. Though I must note that my kids have their rambunctious moments too. But I am blessed to have learned early the value of being strict with your kids. Being strict does not mean lacking love, just being clear in expectation. This is hard to describe to a by-stander. It's hard to explain to them that your child cannot have the juice because you already told her 'no' and giving in to her crying, no matter how pathetic or no matter how much your heart breaks and thinks about 'just this time', teaching consistency is a far greater skill. No, people, being a Nazi about life is not the answer either. Don't think that my kids won't ever get ice cream or enjoy the freedom of yelling at the top of their lungs during play. But yelling at the top of their lungs in the car is not going to cut it, Boundaries create predictability. Predictability creates stability. Stability creates a calm child.
I guess when it boils down to it I just don't want to live in a constant state of chaos. I don't want to live in chasing down a toddler because running through the parking lot is an option. Introverted me would explode without some quiet around the house - and quiet is a loose definition with 2 of your own kids and 1 you watch throughout the week.
I am blessed by a toddler that enjoys quiet play as well as noisy play. Our mornings here are pretty quiet, with Abi napping, and Rachael usually looking at books, silently pulling a pull-toy in the hallway, and spending some Mommy-time laughing at the jack-in-the-box's flailing arms when you try to stuff him in. Rachael knows what to expect - each morning she's asked to play quietly if she wants to be in the room while I put Abi to sleep, and she prefers to be with us. Then Rachael knows that Abi sleeping means that she needs to be quiet in the hallway, but can feel free to be loud and play in the living room or the playroom or the fireside room. But Rachael has learned the difference between playing loudly and playing recklessly. And I am sincerely thankful to God that my efforts to help Rachael with her self-control, by creating boundaries, have created a very well-mannered (though she odes have her moments) and responsive child. She's still a toddler, people, and no I'm not the baby whisperer (that's my father-in-law), but predictability and clear expectation go for MILES.
Abi, on the other hand, is a more entertainment driven child. Her nature is to desire you to entertain her, or a toy that has movement and entertainment over a quiet toy. Knowing this about her character, though, does not mean she is constantly entertained. She, too, is expected to provide her own entertainment while playing on the floor beside my laundry folding, etc. And while she is more fussy about it at times, she has come into the same ability to self-entertain with understanding of the expectation. Now seriously, people, she's only 8 months old, I'm not asking her to self-entertain for 40 minutes, but age-appropriately I am asking her to self-entertain. And once she understands the expectation (though sometimes Abi is much more stubborn than my Rachael), she too finds enjoyment in the clear boundaries.
I love them for their differences, but the expectation has not changed. How I teach them the expectation is unique to the child, but I try hard to be as consistent with my expectation and keep my end-goal desire in mind. It's not about control. It's about wanting to enjoy the ride of life. It's about wanting to make a home that is welcoming and comfortable for all. It's about wanting to raise my kiddos to enjoy life and get the most from the moment while still learning the values of respect, and honor because of Jesus wanting us to respect and honor each other.
Please hear my heart here... I'm not bragging. God has RICHLY blessed me in the obedience and the approach to teaching self-control and obedience to my kids. And I have a LONG way to go in upbringing kiddos to honor Christ. God is constantly reshaping me and remolding me to honor Him more and more with my family. To God be all the glory for the successes of my little family. I just want to come to Him holding out my family and be able to say, "I tried hard to run after You with these kids. My offering is so insufficient but I give it to You."
What are some ways you give your family to Jesus, no matter how big or small your family?
Thursday, February 24, 2011
The Power of 'No'
The predictable utterance of any toddler. The half-hearted response written across any teenager's face at their parent's exciting vacation plans. The programmed response of any adolescent when offered an "uncool" option. Yes, friends. I'm talking about the word, "NO."
Such a small word with great power.
I've found that this word may not produce immediate smiles or high fives, but sometimes it's the best response of honesty available.
God's been teaching me a lot lately. As I type that sentence I wonder at the marvel that He would still teach me and take time to walk this road with me even as I stumble along in my toddling for truth moments.
"Where is your ministry?" is often thrown around in the Christian church.
"My ministry."
"I just can't find a place to serve."
Pastor's wives (and church staff wives), I have found, are either expected to run everything - the church MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group, Jr. High girl's bible study, vacation bible school kindergarten 2 class, and raise 5 babies - 2 from Africa- while keeping the house cleaned and dinner on the table at 5pm. Or there's the "does our Pastor have a wife?" staff wife that lives in her house and tries to keep from attending prayer meeting in her bathrobe.
Sure there are those staff wives that are able to find the beauty in balancing their crazy kids (who's kids aren't crazy), bake brownies for the next church social, and stick to only teaching their 3rd grade Sunday School class. But while we all aspire to be them we have our wonderful moments of feeling the fluctuating from the overbooked to the hermit.
And while my brain and heart digests the unspoken, yet felt, expectations or, for a kinder word, "desires" of a church Body on the Pastor's wife/staff wife I find God walking in with a whole new life motto.
"Just say 'no'."
What God? Come again?
At some stages of life God is revealing to me that He just wants me here; folding the laundry while singing praises, picking up the talking hamster pet toy for the umpteenth time, changing one more diaper, and serving my husband where I am.
You know, maybe I create too much pressure on myself. Or maybe I am just trying to serve where I have in the past. But I am learning that sometimes the best thing I can do and the best glorifier of Jesus that I can be is the wife that: makes Godly goals with her family, gets up with the baby and rocks that new tooth out of hiding, prays for her husband and listens to his heart, tries to come up with new ways to surprise her husband with an 'I love you' note, joins in toddler dances with flailing arms and no reservation to 'old school' Sunday School songs, and prays 'thank yous' to Jesus for His marvelous works while scraping food off the dishes.
Matt has a lot on his shoulders and He needs to unload on His Savior. But am I ushering Him into the presence of God? Or am I heaping more onto the load because I failed to say 'no'?
Someone will always ask me to do more. And I hope they never stop asking because it gives me opportunities to run to Jesus and say, "What about now? Did You want me to do this?" But there's no shame in saying, "I agree. That ministry direction sounds great and is just what our church needs. I'll pray for more workers alongside you and let you know if God is calling me to add more than prayer."
He's given me so much to be thankful for. And while I'm not to be self-serving and not to seek out the easiest road. I am reminded again and again that I will be standing at the throne of God in judgment (not Heaven or Hell. That question is sealed already.) . And though I will always have "I wish I would have done better" on my lips (if I can even talk), I want to say that I tried hard to serve and serve with my family. I want to say, I received your ministry in my life and ran hard.
So today I woke up stretching (and yawning) as my ministry awoke me over the baby monitor. My ministry filled the kitchen sink and sat by the washer. My ministry woke up for another dry morning and toddled to her little potty. And I kissed my ministry as he headed out the door for the office. And now I'm about to go clean out my ministry's dirty littler box and then rescue my ministry from her torturous napping crib. Tomorrow, if the weather's nice, my ministry could be sitting on the park bench watching her kids play too or standing on the side of the road asking for a hand-out.
Thank you, Lord, for the ministry you have given me.
Please continue to help me grow and mature more in serving my ministry as you expand and develop it.
I'm reminded of the praise Chorus:
Where you lead me, Lord, I will follow...
Where you lead me, Lord, I will go...
-to God be the glory.
Such a small word with great power.
I've found that this word may not produce immediate smiles or high fives, but sometimes it's the best response of honesty available.
God's been teaching me a lot lately. As I type that sentence I wonder at the marvel that He would still teach me and take time to walk this road with me even as I stumble along in my toddling for truth moments.
"Where is your ministry?" is often thrown around in the Christian church.
"My ministry."
"I just can't find a place to serve."
Pastor's wives (and church staff wives), I have found, are either expected to run everything - the church MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group, Jr. High girl's bible study, vacation bible school kindergarten 2 class, and raise 5 babies - 2 from Africa- while keeping the house cleaned and dinner on the table at 5pm. Or there's the "does our Pastor have a wife?" staff wife that lives in her house and tries to keep from attending prayer meeting in her bathrobe.
Sure there are those staff wives that are able to find the beauty in balancing their crazy kids (who's kids aren't crazy), bake brownies for the next church social, and stick to only teaching their 3rd grade Sunday School class. But while we all aspire to be them we have our wonderful moments of feeling the fluctuating from the overbooked to the hermit.
And while my brain and heart digests the unspoken, yet felt, expectations or, for a kinder word, "desires" of a church Body on the Pastor's wife/staff wife I find God walking in with a whole new life motto.
"Just say 'no'."
What God? Come again?
At some stages of life God is revealing to me that He just wants me here; folding the laundry while singing praises, picking up the talking hamster pet toy for the umpteenth time, changing one more diaper, and serving my husband where I am.
You know, maybe I create too much pressure on myself. Or maybe I am just trying to serve where I have in the past. But I am learning that sometimes the best thing I can do and the best glorifier of Jesus that I can be is the wife that: makes Godly goals with her family, gets up with the baby and rocks that new tooth out of hiding, prays for her husband and listens to his heart, tries to come up with new ways to surprise her husband with an 'I love you' note, joins in toddler dances with flailing arms and no reservation to 'old school' Sunday School songs, and prays 'thank yous' to Jesus for His marvelous works while scraping food off the dishes.
Matt has a lot on his shoulders and He needs to unload on His Savior. But am I ushering Him into the presence of God? Or am I heaping more onto the load because I failed to say 'no'?
Someone will always ask me to do more. And I hope they never stop asking because it gives me opportunities to run to Jesus and say, "What about now? Did You want me to do this?" But there's no shame in saying, "I agree. That ministry direction sounds great and is just what our church needs. I'll pray for more workers alongside you and let you know if God is calling me to add more than prayer."
He's given me so much to be thankful for. And while I'm not to be self-serving and not to seek out the easiest road. I am reminded again and again that I will be standing at the throne of God in judgment (not Heaven or Hell. That question is sealed already.) . And though I will always have "I wish I would have done better" on my lips (if I can even talk), I want to say that I tried hard to serve and serve with my family. I want to say, I received your ministry in my life and ran hard.
So today I woke up stretching (and yawning) as my ministry awoke me over the baby monitor. My ministry filled the kitchen sink and sat by the washer. My ministry woke up for another dry morning and toddled to her little potty. And I kissed my ministry as he headed out the door for the office. And now I'm about to go clean out my ministry's dirty littler box and then rescue my ministry from her torturous napping crib. Tomorrow, if the weather's nice, my ministry could be sitting on the park bench watching her kids play too or standing on the side of the road asking for a hand-out.
Thank you, Lord, for the ministry you have given me.
Please continue to help me grow and mature more in serving my ministry as you expand and develop it.
I'm reminded of the praise Chorus:
Where you lead me, Lord, I will follow...
Where you lead me, Lord, I will go...
-to God be the glory.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Unpredictable
If there's one thing I've learned it's that life with a 2 year old and an 8 month old can be pretty unpredictable. Let me show you what I mean:
When she decided to pick her own seat at the snack table, I didn't really know what I agreed to. =)
Sometimes smiles are inevitable.
A balloon can quickly become a best friend.
Sometimes smiles are inevitable.
A balloon can quickly become a best friend.
You never really know what she'll show off from the dress up box.
She always looks like Daddy.
But in some moments she REALLY looks like Daddy. ;)
But no matter what may come, I'll still be addicted to
that laughing smile
and those baby blues.
Overheard
Dakota howls and jumps about.
Matt standing at the coat closet, "Hey listen. I'm not going outside to freeze my butt off without a jacket because you're a little impatient."
Dakota howls at him and jumps about.
-Sometimes talking back is funny.-
_______________________________________________________
Background: We have recycled a butter tub to use in the bathtub as a small bucket with which to clean soap from baby hair.
Rachael with all innocence: "Ready Abi?" Holding the bucket of water above Abi's head. "Look down and hold your breath." (Quoting what she has been told many a time.)
- Sometimes my Little Mommy needs to be reminded that I'm the Mommy. hehe. -
No one freak out, people, I caught her in time. =)
________________________________________________________
Matt standing at the coat closet, "Hey listen. I'm not going outside to freeze my butt off without a jacket because you're a little impatient."
Dakota howls at him and jumps about.
-Sometimes talking back is funny.-
_______________________________________________________
Background: We have recycled a butter tub to use in the bathtub as a small bucket with which to clean soap from baby hair.
Rachael with all innocence: "Ready Abi?" Holding the bucket of water above Abi's head. "Look down and hold your breath." (Quoting what she has been told many a time.)
- Sometimes my Little Mommy needs to be reminded that I'm the Mommy. hehe. -
No one freak out, people, I caught her in time. =)
________________________________________________________
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Eyes Wide Open
We enjoyed a Sara Groves concert last night. As I commented on Facebook, it was such a blessing to see the face of my little Rachael light up when Sara sang her favorite song. It's like a whole new world opened on that toddler's face as she heard the familiar favorites that fill our car speakers and warm our home, played and sung from the heart of the writer on stage, behind the piano in a local church. Two worlds collided. And that toddler just had to stand on the pew and see Sara from our seats - five or so rows back. Rachael's little voice singing along as nearly a years worth of memorized songs poured from her little mind. Too precious. Too precious.
Next time Matt and I see Sara Groves, and the next time she'll be n this area for that matter, is at the Orphans weekend in May that we're planning on attending. I didn't even know this was going on, in all honesty, until Matt wrapped the information and gave it to me for my birthday. See... it's way more than an excuse to sing along to my favorite artist (though that is quite thrilling in itself).
Matt and I feel compelled and called to adopt. We're still in the development stages of what that will mean for our family and feel very comfortable with being on the outer circle and beginning phases of that process. It's just one more way that we're striving to serve Jesus with all that we have. (Don't worry this won't be the last that you hear of this, much to your chagrin.)
I've been reminded lately in all things that there is so much more out there for us to do and pray for. It's so easy to get caught in the child-raising phase that before you know it the routines become selfish, as if your family was the only one that existed. Don't worry, people, I'm not talking about throwing out naptime -- no, no, that's for the good of mankind. =) But I am talking about using time wisely.
It's looking for those conversations about Jesus. Seeking those times to encourage a fellow believer. Wanting Jesus to be more and more in your conversation. That Kingdom work would ocurr and not just more small-talk.
Because believe it or not, each day we leave a legacy. A legacy exemplifying who we are, what we value, and why we keep on going. And I want my legacy to be more than good morals and good values and nice words.
- Oh that they would see Jesus. -
And that I'd do better at getting of the way.
That I may decrease that HE may increase.
I'm not trying to control the conversation or manipulate others. I'm just wanting to leave good seeds and walk beside others as we figure out what it is to constantly seek His face.
I mean come on, if He can use this filthy rag then I know he can use any one of us.
In the words of a sweet Sara Groves song, "I'm gonna keep my eyes wide open, keep my eyes wide open."
- wanting Your perspective to trump mine.
Next time Matt and I see Sara Groves, and the next time she'll be n this area for that matter, is at the Orphans weekend in May that we're planning on attending. I didn't even know this was going on, in all honesty, until Matt wrapped the information and gave it to me for my birthday. See... it's way more than an excuse to sing along to my favorite artist (though that is quite thrilling in itself).
Matt and I feel compelled and called to adopt. We're still in the development stages of what that will mean for our family and feel very comfortable with being on the outer circle and beginning phases of that process. It's just one more way that we're striving to serve Jesus with all that we have. (Don't worry this won't be the last that you hear of this, much to your chagrin.)
I've been reminded lately in all things that there is so much more out there for us to do and pray for. It's so easy to get caught in the child-raising phase that before you know it the routines become selfish, as if your family was the only one that existed. Don't worry, people, I'm not talking about throwing out naptime -- no, no, that's for the good of mankind. =) But I am talking about using time wisely.
It's looking for those conversations about Jesus. Seeking those times to encourage a fellow believer. Wanting Jesus to be more and more in your conversation. That Kingdom work would ocurr and not just more small-talk.
Because believe it or not, each day we leave a legacy. A legacy exemplifying who we are, what we value, and why we keep on going. And I want my legacy to be more than good morals and good values and nice words.
- Oh that they would see Jesus. -
And that I'd do better at getting of the way.
That I may decrease that HE may increase.
I'm not trying to control the conversation or manipulate others. I'm just wanting to leave good seeds and walk beside others as we figure out what it is to constantly seek His face.
I mean come on, if He can use this filthy rag then I know he can use any one of us.
In the words of a sweet Sara Groves song, "I'm gonna keep my eyes wide open, keep my eyes wide open."
- wanting Your perspective to trump mine.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Changes
As you might have noticed, I opened the window and brightened up the blog page a bit. It was time for a change and I enjoy the yellow. If the text is hard to read in the contrast (since I don't usually read my text on my actual blog site) then let me know and I'll see what I can do to fix it.
As with this blog page change, we have been instilling little changes in our household to better the environment (no, I have not been evicted). We're trying harder to focus on Jesus in our everyday lives and integrate more of Christ into our thoughts and conversations. Thus has begun the following changes:
- the Family Goals : We set up 3 goals (summaries of the values we wanted to add to our lives in the next year) and two specific sub-goals underneath each of the three goals. Our goals are as follows:
Also had a little fun in making a scrapbook page of our family goals, framing it and putting it on the wall.
We also added a Mommy chore chart so as not to find myself distracted and overwhelmed by the self-destructing house. I made a second scrapbook page saying "to do" with the days lined up much like a calender. Then I put it in a frame up on the wall and sue a dry-erase marker to write the chores onto the glass of the frame. That way things can be subject to change should one of those days arise in which Abi REFUSES to be put down. It's nice to feel the accomplishment of completing a task and saying, "Sorry, that isn't my focus for today" when distractors arise (no, I won't let a toilet explosion keep flooding the house until I can get it written on the chore list).
These two changes, which ultimately have resulted in more changes, have not only helped me feel more organized in my efforts to better serve my family, but also help me feel like I'm able to contribute more and use my time more honoring to God. Managing the chore list and reminding myself of the ultimate goal to raise a God-honoring family is pushing us closer to Christ. (Reminds me of God telling the Israelites to keep the Word of God attached to their foreheads -Ex. 13:9- and repeat the Law of the Lord day and night -Psalm 1). Funny what a little intentionality will do for the soul.
How are you finding new ways to bring Christ to the forefront of your family's minds?
As with this blog page change, we have been instilling little changes in our household to better the environment (no, I have not been evicted). We're trying harder to focus on Jesus in our everyday lives and integrate more of Christ into our thoughts and conversations. Thus has begun the following changes:
- the Family Goals : We set up 3 goals (summaries of the values we wanted to add to our lives in the next year) and two specific sub-goals underneath each of the three goals. Our goals are as follows:
- Integrate more scripture into our daily lives
- Talk more about Jesus
- Pray and Worship more as a family
Also had a little fun in making a scrapbook page of our family goals, framing it and putting it on the wall.
We also added a Mommy chore chart so as not to find myself distracted and overwhelmed by the self-destructing house. I made a second scrapbook page saying "to do" with the days lined up much like a calender. Then I put it in a frame up on the wall and sue a dry-erase marker to write the chores onto the glass of the frame. That way things can be subject to change should one of those days arise in which Abi REFUSES to be put down. It's nice to feel the accomplishment of completing a task and saying, "Sorry, that isn't my focus for today" when distractors arise (no, I won't let a toilet explosion keep flooding the house until I can get it written on the chore list).
These two changes, which ultimately have resulted in more changes, have not only helped me feel more organized in my efforts to better serve my family, but also help me feel like I'm able to contribute more and use my time more honoring to God. Managing the chore list and reminding myself of the ultimate goal to raise a God-honoring family is pushing us closer to Christ. (Reminds me of God telling the Israelites to keep the Word of God attached to their foreheads -Ex. 13:9- and repeat the Law of the Lord day and night -Psalm 1). Funny what a little intentionality will do for the soul.
How are you finding new ways to bring Christ to the forefront of your family's minds?
Tuesday, February 08, 2011
We Lost Him
Today I miss Jesus.
The Body of Christ can be sticky and ugly sometimes when we forget about Jesus. So many times I find it easy to get lost in the talking about nothingness that Kingdom Work seems to have fallen off the map. It's as if talking about family vacations, potty training, pets, new home repair projects, and a whole other list of things takes the spotlight to the things God is doing all around us.
I miss sitting amongst a group of believers whom want nothing more than Jesus.
I miss talking about Jesus and sharing about Jesus and being obsessed with Jesus so much in conversation that you leave the conversation with an even greater hunger for Him than when you started.
I miss the edifying speech that supernaturally overflows amongst friends who are seeking Jesus in their lives.
How come it feels like those people have fallen off the planet in some churches?
How come it feels like those people have left the Bible Study table?
How come it feels like Bible Study and Fellowships are less and less about Jesus and more and more about some created agenda, two second devotion amid small talk, or fake prayer requests as a means of venting home-life frustrations?
I am not trying to be critical for the sake of being critical. There really is a point here.
Have we found we have been traveling for days with our friends and neighbors only to panic after three days realizing we left Jesus behind in the city? How terrifying to realize that we have gone through the motions of Christianity and been traveling for days, or even longer, without the Savior?
How can you too make the Mary and Joseph u-turn to go back for Christ?
God has been challenging me with this for a while.
And I just miss Jesus.
The Body of Christ can be sticky and ugly sometimes when we forget about Jesus. So many times I find it easy to get lost in the talking about nothingness that Kingdom Work seems to have fallen off the map. It's as if talking about family vacations, potty training, pets, new home repair projects, and a whole other list of things takes the spotlight to the things God is doing all around us.
I miss sitting amongst a group of believers whom want nothing more than Jesus.
I miss talking about Jesus and sharing about Jesus and being obsessed with Jesus so much in conversation that you leave the conversation with an even greater hunger for Him than when you started.
I miss the edifying speech that supernaturally overflows amongst friends who are seeking Jesus in their lives.
How come it feels like those people have fallen off the planet in some churches?
How come it feels like those people have left the Bible Study table?
How come it feels like Bible Study and Fellowships are less and less about Jesus and more and more about some created agenda, two second devotion amid small talk, or fake prayer requests as a means of venting home-life frustrations?
I am not trying to be critical for the sake of being critical. There really is a point here.
Have we found we have been traveling for days with our friends and neighbors only to panic after three days realizing we left Jesus behind in the city? How terrifying to realize that we have gone through the motions of Christianity and been traveling for days, or even longer, without the Savior?
How can you too make the Mary and Joseph u-turn to go back for Christ?
God has been challenging me with this for a while.
And I just miss Jesus.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Perspective
Perspective
Please excuse the carpet fuzz in my hair,
She needed me on her level.
Please excuse the “so last year” jeans,
Big pockets produce pacifier comforts.
Please excuse my best sweater’s spaghetti stains,
Biting a tongue is cured by hugs.
Please excuse my lingering outside the nursery door,
When I'm not there she fears I don't exist.
Please excuse my un-kept hair,
She just had to run to see Daddy.
Please excuse these tears in my eyes,
Today they’re small, tomorrow is near.
-written 12/15/2010
Please excuse the carpet fuzz in my hair,
She needed me on her level.
Please excuse the “so last year” jeans,
Big pockets produce pacifier comforts.
Please excuse my best sweater’s spaghetti stains,
Biting a tongue is cured by hugs.
Please excuse my lingering outside the nursery door,
When I'm not there she fears I don't exist.
Please excuse my un-kept hair,
She just had to run to see Daddy.
Please excuse these tears in my eyes,
Today they’re small, tomorrow is near.
-written 12/15/2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
5 Months and Rainy Ramblings
Day 1
Month 5
Today Abi is 5 months old. That may not seem big to you in comparison to years of knowledge and skill, but for me it feels like a blink of an eye ago she was born and now she has five months under her belt. She's a real baby now - no longer that tiny, fragile, fearful stage. She's rolling over (all on her time schedule and not terribly predictable yet), playing with her voice, growing out of her baby car seat, sleeping 10 hours a night, standing in the bouncy-swing and running the world on the weekends. Maybe it's just me, but all of a sudden she feels huge. She's a little person and personality is blooming.
And thus I am thrown into the world of reflection; thinking of how wonderful her addition to our family has been. And how much has changed since college.
You know, it never ceases to amaze me to watch change unfold. Old college friends moving to different states, high school peers getting married and having families of their own... constant change.
And today I'm grateful to sit out on the front porch swing and sip some tea while watching the rain...
because who knows what tomorrow will bring.
... new life
... goodbyes
... more changes.
So today I'm going to swing and say my thank you's to God. Thank you for my husband, my babies, my family, my friends, my little world....
How big this world can feel... while watching the rain fall and sipping my cup of tea.
And thus I am thrown into the world of reflection; thinking of how wonderful her addition to our family has been. And how much has changed since college.
You know, it never ceases to amaze me to watch change unfold. Old college friends moving to different states, high school peers getting married and having families of their own... constant change.
And today I'm grateful to sit out on the front porch swing and sip some tea while watching the rain...
because who knows what tomorrow will bring.
... new life
... goodbyes
... more changes.
So today I'm going to swing and say my thank you's to God. Thank you for my husband, my babies, my family, my friends, my little world....
How big this world can feel... while watching the rain fall and sipping my cup of tea.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Strangers
We finished our journey through the Anne of Green Gables series. It took us ten months. And as I looked backward I realised how much had changed in those ten months. I stared out reading the series with a just-barely one year old in my hands and ended the series with an almost 5 month old and a toddler in bed nearby. Wild to think of the amount of change that happened in our world between chapters. Heck, if we went back today and met those people ten months ago we would find ourselves strangers.
I began thinking today as I listened to Tarzan in the background of Matt and my lunch date in the dining room once the kids were all in their rest places. I wondered how culture shocked adventurers, missionaries and explorers must feel in "visiting" the States, or even just cities. So often we city/suburb folks think of vacationing out to somewhere quiet and how de-stressing that thought would be - a place to avoid all the noise of being home. And yet between expeditions, adventures, or missions trips there must be the opposite affect. How some days I long for the quiet and then on those days I get the quiet I suddenly have no idea what to do. Funny how one can find themselves in both places and be such strangers.
My sister wrote a blog entry on her birthday about enjoying the thought of becoming older. I think she and I share the desire to have a greater usefulness of our lives for Jesus. And I think we also share the same "disillusions" that coming in age is not a bad thing. Apparently our culture feels hat wrinkles and gray hairs need to be masked - as if youth somehow holds the key to all understanding and knowledge. And I was wondering after reading Jes' post if when we are old we will be respected, or if our culture will have successfully written off the possibility that wisdom can indeed come from experience, even experience that shows itself in gray hairs. Nice to now that after 20-some-odd years Jes and I still think quite similarly and have not found ourselves to be strangers.
Rachael's been sick for about a week. We missed church Sunday and were unable to attend again on Wednesday night. While I'm sure people are appreciate Rachael's ability to be selfish with her cold when it comes to their toddlers sharing far too much, there is an odd sense of isolation in he quiet of this un-interrupted week. We usually find ourselves visiting with cousins, planning play dates with friends, and playing in the mall during any given week. But Rachael's nasty coughing and fire-hydrant nose screams "run for your life" to all mothers and their children. And it's funny how one week of shut-in can make me feel like we're strangers.
In less strange news =) :
- Abi's rolling over (occasionally)
- Abi's trying new baby foods
- Abi's enjoying being put down more = YAY!!!
- Rachael's quite creative - sometimes to her detriment
- Rachael still says the funnies things with such sincerity of heart
- Rachael's now sleeping in a toddler bed - the rail is officially gone off her crib.
- Matt's busy with school but is looking forward to the last 2 weeks of school ahead
- Matt and I are going away for a night after Thanksgiving to just be the two of us w/o kids and we're SO EXCITED.
- And well me... um.... yeah, I'm good. Really am. Just humming along here.
Oh and we're starting reading the Chronicles of Narnia now before nap time. Yay fun!
- hope you're doing well!
I began thinking today as I listened to Tarzan in the background of Matt and my lunch date in the dining room once the kids were all in their rest places. I wondered how culture shocked adventurers, missionaries and explorers must feel in "visiting" the States, or even just cities. So often we city/suburb folks think of vacationing out to somewhere quiet and how de-stressing that thought would be - a place to avoid all the noise of being home. And yet between expeditions, adventures, or missions trips there must be the opposite affect. How some days I long for the quiet and then on those days I get the quiet I suddenly have no idea what to do. Funny how one can find themselves in both places and be such strangers.
My sister wrote a blog entry on her birthday about enjoying the thought of becoming older. I think she and I share the desire to have a greater usefulness of our lives for Jesus. And I think we also share the same "disillusions" that coming in age is not a bad thing. Apparently our culture feels hat wrinkles and gray hairs need to be masked - as if youth somehow holds the key to all understanding and knowledge. And I was wondering after reading Jes' post if when we are old we will be respected, or if our culture will have successfully written off the possibility that wisdom can indeed come from experience, even experience that shows itself in gray hairs. Nice to now that after 20-some-odd years Jes and I still think quite similarly and have not found ourselves to be strangers.
Rachael's been sick for about a week. We missed church Sunday and were unable to attend again on Wednesday night. While I'm sure people are appreciate Rachael's ability to be selfish with her cold when it comes to their toddlers sharing far too much, there is an odd sense of isolation in he quiet of this un-interrupted week. We usually find ourselves visiting with cousins, planning play dates with friends, and playing in the mall during any given week. But Rachael's nasty coughing and fire-hydrant nose screams "run for your life" to all mothers and their children. And it's funny how one week of shut-in can make me feel like we're strangers.
In less strange news =) :
- Abi's rolling over (occasionally)
- Abi's trying new baby foods
- Abi's enjoying being put down more = YAY!!!
- Rachael's quite creative - sometimes to her detriment
- Rachael still says the funnies things with such sincerity of heart
- Rachael's now sleeping in a toddler bed - the rail is officially gone off her crib.
- Matt's busy with school but is looking forward to the last 2 weeks of school ahead
- Matt and I are going away for a night after Thanksgiving to just be the two of us w/o kids and we're SO EXCITED.
- And well me... um.... yeah, I'm good. Really am. Just humming along here.
Oh and we're starting reading the Chronicles of Narnia now before nap time. Yay fun!
- hope you're doing well!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Some Ramblings on Reality
"It's been a long time since you've last posted," my husband says as we watch Sunday night football and he picks at a paper/plays on the computer.
Hold on, let me adjust this baby in my arms in order to stop typing with one finger.
When people say that no two children are the same, I couldn't agree more.
So here's my life lately, thus my reasons behind non-posts... day by day. Some days are crazy - like CRAZY - and some days are rest from crazy. And some days and moments are a good mix. But thus is the life of a mom of 2.5 kids (I have an honorary member for 6.5hrs/workday). Please, let me explain a minute...
Rachael is almost 2. No more explanation needed. And Abi wants held - 24/7. And at any given moment in time someone is either fussing or crying or making a nasty diaper or needing something of me. So when do I find my free time? (Oh wait, what's free time?) Nap time. Sometimes, nap time.
And I wouldn't trade it for the world.
You know, I'd like to share a piece of my heart for a moment - and please take this all in context. I love my children - even through their flaws. And that love comes at great cost. Please hear me out, I am not complaining, this motherhood is a choice, but it really is a hard one. I could spend my time working to put my kids in daycare and I'm sure they would turn out to be fairly decent kids. But coming home and being with them 24/7 was a sacrifice, but the right sacrifice.
I feel like all I ever talk about is my kids sometimes. But you must understand, that's what I do right now in my life. I try hard not to dominate conversations and speak about stuff other than funny sayings, booger noses, and explosive diapers - but that is my world. You see, the most advanced conversation I get during the day is a quiet 5.5 y/o. Again, this is not complaining, I chose this and I am grateful for this - but this is just where I'm at.
And I'm not going to lie, there are moments and days in which I want to just put my kds ito someone's arms and get away from the crying and the neediness. There are times that I don't want to be a mom and if one more person asks me for one more thing I'm going to explode. And in those times I find myself on the porch swing, with an Anne of Green Gables book, and usually an Abi in my lap (because the kid won't let me put her down despite my trying).
Matt and I have been going through much comfort-zone pushing. So many times I feel like we're standing on the edge of life, about to fall into a huge adventure. And there are so many days that I feel like Matt is experiencing the adventure of the real world, and I am watching our kids.
There is so much that I want to do and be a part of and see and experience - and then two little ones look at me and have their list of requirements. And some things go back on the shelf for a later in life yet to come.
Do not pity me, please, I am not asking for your pity. I just invite you friends into my life.
Matt is a fantastic husband. Hear that loud and clear. Our church blesses us beyond measure. And I wouldn't trade our little family for the world. But with the place that we're at in life comes much sacrifice. I wonder how my mother felt raising Jes and I while Daddy was at work. She talks of having very few friends - if even any at all - and the financial restraints that they overcame. We were her world, I know it because I was there - and yet I wonder if there were times that she just wanted to be "out there" in the world.
It's funny but staying at home with our kids makes you feel like you're running your life in a different world than most. A 9-5 exists for everyone but you. And when Matt comes home and everyone is off from work, I want so much to spend family time together and raise our kids together that most days friendships occur at scheduled times maybe once/week.
Maybe I am just being welcomed to adulthood - maybe it's more.
I don't regret leaving work - like really how could I? I don't miss the chaos of all the work and the feeling of swimming in created stress imposed upon me by unrealistic requirements (since my employments end my boss has resigned and no one has taken her place and according to past work friends - work is a TOTALLY different place and has changed for the better).
But what I do miss is the adult conversation. I miss feeling like I know anything about what's going on outside of this house. I usually get relayed information, if it gets to me at all, and it's funny how isolating a few kids can be to a 25y/o when most of her friends have either just gotten married or are engaged.
It's odd to be the first to enter into their mid-thirties lifestyle while still 25. It's so weird to be stranded in an age gap at our church - where my closest church friends have kids that are stock-piling our youth group. I am grateful for a friend in Ellen - and I've come to realise how i need her. Somehow being a mom of 2 kids at 25 isn't as ridiculous and isolating with a 26y/o sister in law who's mom of 3.
I wouldn't trade these babies for the world - as little Abi coos at me from my lap. And while the pendulum can feel like it swings to great isolation some days, I find my peace in the other side's company. I just want to be real in admitting where I am. Sometimes my greatest company is a fictional world in Anne of Green Gables, where the storyline can wait through my chaos for another porch swing moment to come - and then it picks up where it left off.
I need to get off of here, Abi's announcing her urgent needs.
Just wanted to post something real - not that my other posts are not real.
Thanks for reading this, those of you that still are.
Hold on, let me adjust this baby in my arms in order to stop typing with one finger.
When people say that no two children are the same, I couldn't agree more.
So here's my life lately, thus my reasons behind non-posts... day by day. Some days are crazy - like CRAZY - and some days are rest from crazy. And some days and moments are a good mix. But thus is the life of a mom of 2.5 kids (I have an honorary member for 6.5hrs/workday). Please, let me explain a minute...
Rachael is almost 2. No more explanation needed. And Abi wants held - 24/7. And at any given moment in time someone is either fussing or crying or making a nasty diaper or needing something of me. So when do I find my free time? (Oh wait, what's free time?) Nap time. Sometimes, nap time.
And I wouldn't trade it for the world.
You know, I'd like to share a piece of my heart for a moment - and please take this all in context. I love my children - even through their flaws. And that love comes at great cost. Please hear me out, I am not complaining, this motherhood is a choice, but it really is a hard one. I could spend my time working to put my kids in daycare and I'm sure they would turn out to be fairly decent kids. But coming home and being with them 24/7 was a sacrifice, but the right sacrifice.
I feel like all I ever talk about is my kids sometimes. But you must understand, that's what I do right now in my life. I try hard not to dominate conversations and speak about stuff other than funny sayings, booger noses, and explosive diapers - but that is my world. You see, the most advanced conversation I get during the day is a quiet 5.5 y/o. Again, this is not complaining, I chose this and I am grateful for this - but this is just where I'm at.
And I'm not going to lie, there are moments and days in which I want to just put my kds ito someone's arms and get away from the crying and the neediness. There are times that I don't want to be a mom and if one more person asks me for one more thing I'm going to explode. And in those times I find myself on the porch swing, with an Anne of Green Gables book, and usually an Abi in my lap (because the kid won't let me put her down despite my trying).
Matt and I have been going through much comfort-zone pushing. So many times I feel like we're standing on the edge of life, about to fall into a huge adventure. And there are so many days that I feel like Matt is experiencing the adventure of the real world, and I am watching our kids.
There is so much that I want to do and be a part of and see and experience - and then two little ones look at me and have their list of requirements. And some things go back on the shelf for a later in life yet to come.
Do not pity me, please, I am not asking for your pity. I just invite you friends into my life.
Matt is a fantastic husband. Hear that loud and clear. Our church blesses us beyond measure. And I wouldn't trade our little family for the world. But with the place that we're at in life comes much sacrifice. I wonder how my mother felt raising Jes and I while Daddy was at work. She talks of having very few friends - if even any at all - and the financial restraints that they overcame. We were her world, I know it because I was there - and yet I wonder if there were times that she just wanted to be "out there" in the world.
It's funny but staying at home with our kids makes you feel like you're running your life in a different world than most. A 9-5 exists for everyone but you. And when Matt comes home and everyone is off from work, I want so much to spend family time together and raise our kids together that most days friendships occur at scheduled times maybe once/week.
Maybe I am just being welcomed to adulthood - maybe it's more.
I don't regret leaving work - like really how could I? I don't miss the chaos of all the work and the feeling of swimming in created stress imposed upon me by unrealistic requirements (since my employments end my boss has resigned and no one has taken her place and according to past work friends - work is a TOTALLY different place and has changed for the better).
But what I do miss is the adult conversation. I miss feeling like I know anything about what's going on outside of this house. I usually get relayed information, if it gets to me at all, and it's funny how isolating a few kids can be to a 25y/o when most of her friends have either just gotten married or are engaged.
It's odd to be the first to enter into their mid-thirties lifestyle while still 25. It's so weird to be stranded in an age gap at our church - where my closest church friends have kids that are stock-piling our youth group. I am grateful for a friend in Ellen - and I've come to realise how i need her. Somehow being a mom of 2 kids at 25 isn't as ridiculous and isolating with a 26y/o sister in law who's mom of 3.
I wouldn't trade these babies for the world - as little Abi coos at me from my lap. And while the pendulum can feel like it swings to great isolation some days, I find my peace in the other side's company. I just want to be real in admitting where I am. Sometimes my greatest company is a fictional world in Anne of Green Gables, where the storyline can wait through my chaos for another porch swing moment to come - and then it picks up where it left off.
I need to get off of here, Abi's announcing her urgent needs.
Just wanted to post something real - not that my other posts are not real.
Thanks for reading this, those of you that still are.
Monday, August 30, 2010
The Wall
We've all experienced it... after a long and wonderful time you hit it...
The Wall.
Over the past month: Matt has started back at seminary, Summer has ended and school has started for Lexi (the child I watch), our Pastor has been out of the office due to a shoulder surgery so Matt has been "on call", Matt has started and finished preaching his first sermon series, Rachael has started making a pattern of waking in the middle of the night and refusing to nap interspersedly, Abi has had many "grumpy" days where little satisfies her, I have been having headaches, our 3 year anniversary and 3 days of festivities ensued (including 2 late nights after Dave/Busters and King's Island), and we stayed the weekend at my parent's house with just me, the kids, and a favorite helper so Jes, Mom and I could sing a trio in church.
Yes, world, now that all this has happened we find ourselves at the foot of the wall.... in pieces....
So for the next few days I have vowed to just run the normal routine, normal nap/bedtimes, normal schedules. And I'm hoping by us getting back to normal Rachael will begin to sleep better, Abi will be less grumpy (and in turn all of us will be less grumpy), we'll all sleep a bit better and my headaches may subside. With a few lock-down, nearly pajama days I feel the hope that normalcy will again find itself in our desiring company.
We have had our peaks and our valleys in this past month, but I wouldn't trade it for the world... just happy to feel the embrace of a quiet house again. (Cue the breathing.)
Hope things are going well with you all...
The Wall.
Over the past month: Matt has started back at seminary, Summer has ended and school has started for Lexi (the child I watch), our Pastor has been out of the office due to a shoulder surgery so Matt has been "on call", Matt has started and finished preaching his first sermon series, Rachael has started making a pattern of waking in the middle of the night and refusing to nap interspersedly, Abi has had many "grumpy" days where little satisfies her, I have been having headaches, our 3 year anniversary and 3 days of festivities ensued (including 2 late nights after Dave/Busters and King's Island), and we stayed the weekend at my parent's house with just me, the kids, and a favorite helper so Jes, Mom and I could sing a trio in church.
Yes, world, now that all this has happened we find ourselves at the foot of the wall.... in pieces....
So for the next few days I have vowed to just run the normal routine, normal nap/bedtimes, normal schedules. And I'm hoping by us getting back to normal Rachael will begin to sleep better, Abi will be less grumpy (and in turn all of us will be less grumpy), we'll all sleep a bit better and my headaches may subside. With a few lock-down, nearly pajama days I feel the hope that normalcy will again find itself in our desiring company.
We have had our peaks and our valleys in this past month, but I wouldn't trade it for the world... just happy to feel the embrace of a quiet house again. (Cue the breathing.)
Hope things are going well with you all...
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Summertime!!!
I was backing out of the sprinkler park parking spot upon saying our goodbyes to dear friends. With hugs allotted and all children in their proper carseats after a few hours of good hard play a sweet, small and exhausted voice came from the backseat... "bye bye water."
_______
We're back in the swing of things, Lexi has returned to our clan once again. And thus we find our afternoons and our weeks filled once again with 5 y/o laughter and playing. Three can be a challenge sometimes during the day, but juggling may have some disastrous near-misses turned into brilliant thrill rides. Abi and Rachael are on a predictable enough schedule that we can do wonderful things like... leave the house and try on some new scenery. While we have one window frame per day that allows us to get out before we need to either be at lock-down at someone's home or return for nap time, it is fun to feel the life of summer again.
And Matt has been amazingly helpful in catering Abi's nursing needs with my modesty needs and my desire not to share too much human anatomy with five year old curiosity. Lexi has been wonderful in permitting me some space to feed Abi and yet not be utterly secluded from my very active and needing supervision and guidance toddler.
The addition of a swing set and piano (thanks again Jenney) helps to bring some "at home" entertainment to the array of familiar toys on scalding hot days. It's nice to have a playground in the backyard on days that leaving the house feels like way too much work. And with a few playgrounds in walking distance and the library nearby we are back into the swing of enjoying the free's of the neighborhood.
One diamond in the ruff is the free sprinkler park a community over. In one of my more ambitious moments, we wrangled up bathing suits, slapped on the sunblock and fond ourselves enjoying the heat together. With a five year old scream of excitement upon view of the water zone after pulling into the parking lot the park is destined not to disappoint. Add a few friends to the mix and some cousins and you get two kids knocked out cold for afternoon rest time. It was wonderful.
But don't ever underestimate the adventure found in normalcy - like giving Abi a bath, AKA watering Rachael and the bathroom floor while dumping butter tubs of water on "Abi's belly." Everyone helps and we all have a jolly good time. Even Abi appeared not to mind getting a plastic spoon thrown into her tub (thank you, Rachael).
Needless to say, we are enjoying summer here and hoping all is well with you all.
____________
_______
We're back in the swing of things, Lexi has returned to our clan once again. And thus we find our afternoons and our weeks filled once again with 5 y/o laughter and playing. Three can be a challenge sometimes during the day, but juggling may have some disastrous near-misses turned into brilliant thrill rides. Abi and Rachael are on a predictable enough schedule that we can do wonderful things like... leave the house and try on some new scenery. While we have one window frame per day that allows us to get out before we need to either be at lock-down at someone's home or return for nap time, it is fun to feel the life of summer again.
And Matt has been amazingly helpful in catering Abi's nursing needs with my modesty needs and my desire not to share too much human anatomy with five year old curiosity. Lexi has been wonderful in permitting me some space to feed Abi and yet not be utterly secluded from my very active and needing supervision and guidance toddler.
The addition of a swing set and piano (thanks again Jenney) helps to bring some "at home" entertainment to the array of familiar toys on scalding hot days. It's nice to have a playground in the backyard on days that leaving the house feels like way too much work. And with a few playgrounds in walking distance and the library nearby we are back into the swing of enjoying the free's of the neighborhood.
One diamond in the ruff is the free sprinkler park a community over. In one of my more ambitious moments, we wrangled up bathing suits, slapped on the sunblock and fond ourselves enjoying the heat together. With a five year old scream of excitement upon view of the water zone after pulling into the parking lot the park is destined not to disappoint. Add a few friends to the mix and some cousins and you get two kids knocked out cold for afternoon rest time. It was wonderful.
But don't ever underestimate the adventure found in normalcy - like giving Abi a bath, AKA watering Rachael and the bathroom floor while dumping butter tubs of water on "Abi's belly." Everyone helps and we all have a jolly good time. Even Abi appeared not to mind getting a plastic spoon thrown into her tub (thank you, Rachael).
Needless to say, we are enjoying summer here and hoping all is well with you all.
____________
"Go Get Daddy"
- just another picture of the joy of Rachael's world. -
Friday, July 09, 2010
The Girls and Reminders
Peaks and Valleys fill our lives here at the parsonage. Peaks of "we're making it well with two kids," and valleys of "are we going to make it through the next ten minutes?" It's helped me ask for help more and admit my shortcomings more, which is not always that comfortable. (wink)
"The girls" Matt called them when explaining to his mom that he needed to get off the phone because we were out and about with "the girls." The phrase brought back years of taking care of "the girls" moments passed between Mom and Dad on the phone. We were "the girls" in Daddy's talk many a time. And now we have our own "the girls." In that moment our family felt wonderfully complete or shall I say, well rounded. The girls.... we now really have two kids. Wow, we're parents.... TWICE. In some moments that fact seems to age me by 10 years and in other moments that fact sees to label me irresponsible. Maybe I flirt on both sides. =)
Nothing like a good on-fire Christian to make you feel like a cold coal. But I am grateful for the reminders to continually seek the Source of Flame. Sometimes I find myself feeling like I'm doing nothing for the Kingdom when I witness old peers and younger adults say, selling all their stuff and moving to Africa (wink, wink to Theresa). It's so easy to get caught up in the comparison game here until I begin to feel like Matt working at a Baptist church in Miamisburg is nothing compared to running off to the mission field. Maybe it's part of my adventurous dreamer feeling antsy. Maybe I'm getting to "used to" church. Maybe Moses doesn't feel like he's coming back with the Ten commandments so I start building calves. God's been using friends' stories of devotion as little heart-checks for me. It's nice to have your eyes opened and be spurred on... after the sting is behind you. =) But I am grateful of the reminder that this world is not my home, so don't get too comfy here. Changing diapers is my lifestyle, but not my worth or my mission. How am I serving beyond the routines? Am I intentional? I've been chewing on those thoughts for a little while - they tend to be tough and lasting.
- Just sharing a little brain vomit with you all....
feel properly stained. (ewww, bad illustration.)
Take care, all.
=)
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Arrival of a Tiny One
Abi's here - all 8 lbs of her. She's a long and tiny one weighing in at 8lbs 8.7oz and 22 inches long at birth (this is one of the few times in her life that it'll be appropriate to ask about her weight. hehe). She is a sweet little blond haired, gray/blue eyed (like her Daddy) baby who has fit just wonderfully into our little family.
You know, it's funny to hear of us being a "family of four" now. Marrying a husband who is the second of 7 children, having two kids doesn't sound all that impressive (since we all know I live to impress others - HA). But looking at my side of the family, a family of four is the landing place for many of us. So being called a family of four feels like a big deal sometimes. This having two kids is where many people say, "all right, we're done." And there certainly are moments in my little world of being mom to two temporarily I-need-your-attention-right-now-in-this-moment-or-I'm-going-to-lose-all-control kids that make me understand why some people say "done" at two. Who knows what Matt and I have in our future regarding our family, this could be the "end of the road" regarding populating our household- or maybe it could be the start of a batch of 500 kids. Kidding.
All I know is that our little, or big in many eyes, family of four is so wonderful. I am finding myself blessed beyond anything I could have imagined to just hold my babies. Sure, according to "most of the planet" I'm out of my mind for having two children just under 18 months apart (until I introduce my neice and two nephews who are all in the same family and 3 y/o and under). But quite the contrary - Rachael and Abi will be a year apart in school and can you imagine how fun the older preschool years will be with dress-up play and outdoor sprinklers in the yard and family vacations? Oh it's not to imply that my kids aren't fun now, cause that's not the case. It's just so wonderful to think of the life that they have and will bring to the household as they grow up together. We are so blessed. So blessed.
Thanks God.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Just a Toy
It’s funny how much joy it brought to me to see Rachael running to me with an old favorite toy. She came to me to show me one of her favorite toys from when she was learning to crawl until walking. And for a 17 month old, any toy that makes the favorite list for a good 5 months is a big deal – that’s a good part of her life. This little toy sings a rhyming song about the animal that is face-up on the cube. It’s a completely fabric cube toy so it’s little baby-teething safe. Rachael loved it so much that Matt and I have the rhyming songs for each of the 6 sides memorized. We could practically sing them in our sleep.
But what means more to me than the cube is the memory of the smiles and animation that toy brought out of little Rachael. It was that same animation and excitement the small toddler had as she ran to me with the toy.
I remember that specific cube toy going on a trip with me to Dallas. I was nannying for a three year old and a 9 month old on their vacation. I had those same songs memorized since the cube was one of a handful of toys we had with us for a week. And when the news spread of my pregnancy with Rachael, the hand-me-down cube toy found it’s way to our home. How funny to think of the now 8 or so year old (once 3 y/o) and her younger brother who is 5 (once 9 months) – and since then there’s been another brother added to the family. It was just funny how Rachael running across the room to me with utter joy flashed all the memories through my mind at once. And now our little Abi will get the blessing of playing with the same cube of memories.
But what means more to me than the cube is the memory of the smiles and animation that toy brought out of little Rachael. It was that same animation and excitement the small toddler had as she ran to me with the toy.
I remember that specific cube toy going on a trip with me to Dallas. I was nannying for a three year old and a 9 month old on their vacation. I had those same songs memorized since the cube was one of a handful of toys we had with us for a week. And when the news spread of my pregnancy with Rachael, the hand-me-down cube toy found it’s way to our home. How funny to think of the now 8 or so year old (once 3 y/o) and her younger brother who is 5 (once 9 months) – and since then there’s been another brother added to the family. It was just funny how Rachael running across the room to me with utter joy flashed all the memories through my mind at once. And now our little Abi will get the blessing of playing with the same cube of memories.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Hands Together
I was just thinking about our 1 year anniversary to Niagara Falls today. I was flipping through some pictures and thought I'd finally get around to trying to fix some of my beginner photography errors in those pictures. And it hit me like a tun of bricks...
I just wanted to get away with Matt again. I couldn't help but smile as I flipped through the pictures. That was a great trip. But the most fun I had in that trip was just walking beside Matt as we explored the area. It was the walking next to him as we experienced things together for the first time that I wanted and am left wanting after flipping through those memories.
We do life together well, I must say. Yes, we have our hiccups like all do, but we find our enjoyment in doing life together (which is a good thing right, since we're stuck with each other for the rest of our lives). But there is just something about Matt that makes me want him to myself here and there. I love his character. I love to talk to him. And I really just love sitting next to him or walking next to him - no words have to be expressed. This may seem gooshy and silly since I am a "grown woman" and should love and like my husband. But I still enjoy the continually newfound revelation that Matt is my best friend and my true love.
As life takes us where God directs, I am finding that my heart holds greater and greater depths of love for Matt. Each passing day I come to realise that I love him more today than I did yesterday and all the more today do I want to just walk beside him - even stronger is the desire today than yesterday.
And so in that same flood of emotion I find myself just wanting to get away with Matt, away from the distraction and noise - just to be with him... and see ... and experience ... life.
We don't have to go far or spend a bunch of money, it's the quality time that speaks to my heart.
I just love holding his hand and doing life together...
Friday, April 16, 2010
Can I get a Witness?
I have witnessed wrath waiting around the corner, scrunched down, with crazy in his eyes as naive Dakota trots down the hallway - oblivious of anything other than "play, play, play.'
I have witnessed wrath flying accross the room and racing like mad under the table and around the chairs with no provoking.
I have witnessed wrath sit innocently with big eyes, melt your heart, and then the next minute sink a claw into a passing dog face with brutal hissing.
I have witnessed wrath, I live with wrath...
his name is Juneau.
And I adore him.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Good Ole Days
I am happy to be found old fashioned when it comes to raising Rachael.
I guess I just think there is too big of a push for kids to grow up. I have found more exposure to this regarding the kind of comedy that kids are watching on say, the Disney channel. Like "I Carly" for example. I don't have anthing against the show, personally, there's not any garbage in the show or poor material. It's just that it's encouraged to have a small child watch the show. The show's designed for the "pre-teen" population, but many of the clothes are sold in preschool sizes. Again, there's nothing distasteful about the show, it's just that there's something about cartoons and silly little kid shows disappearing that makes me a bit sad. (Gotta love PBS, but somehow they're the only channel that has kept truly preschool shows.) Dora, which was actually designed for the preschool age, is now a "baby show" and something "older" has taken Dora's place in the preschooler's eyes.
It's sad to watch a child really have no idea how to play. It reminds me of two little girls in my old afternoon kindergarten class. They were "surprise" kids in a line of older siblings. And these girls were so obesssed with appearance and "boyfriends" that they did not know how to play. They just sat around talking about others. It was so sad. Sticks and dirt and rocks meant nothing to them. I remember how I used to play outside all day long n the summer. I have no idea what I did, but I loved it. Now don't get me wrong, there's the book readers verses outdoor kids among us everywhere, but the book readers used to be the exception to the other "normal" kids who played outdoors. Now the book readers remain still the exception and the majority being kids that struggle to play. The routine instead is coming home from daycare , where a tight schedule is created with minimal freeplay, supper, bath and bed. Where's the imagination encouragement?
I miss the concept of putting a kid in play clothes and letting them tear loose in the backyard mud. Now their polo might get dirty.
Sure I'm stuck in my own bias, I'll be happy to own up to that. I just wish I heard of more parents who play dressup with their kids instead of turn on the TV. I wish I saw evidence of more parents stacking blocks without needing to announce colors and shapes with Einstein movies in the background for their 9 month old. There is value in learning, but sometimes we can push too hard to grow a child up that we lose the joy of their current development. Sometimes splashing in the bathtub and mouthing toys is enough.
Hope I don't forget that any time soon.
I guess I just think there is too big of a push for kids to grow up. I have found more exposure to this regarding the kind of comedy that kids are watching on say, the Disney channel. Like "I Carly" for example. I don't have anthing against the show, personally, there's not any garbage in the show or poor material. It's just that it's encouraged to have a small child watch the show. The show's designed for the "pre-teen" population, but many of the clothes are sold in preschool sizes. Again, there's nothing distasteful about the show, it's just that there's something about cartoons and silly little kid shows disappearing that makes me a bit sad. (Gotta love PBS, but somehow they're the only channel that has kept truly preschool shows.) Dora, which was actually designed for the preschool age, is now a "baby show" and something "older" has taken Dora's place in the preschooler's eyes.
It's sad to watch a child really have no idea how to play. It reminds me of two little girls in my old afternoon kindergarten class. They were "surprise" kids in a line of older siblings. And these girls were so obesssed with appearance and "boyfriends" that they did not know how to play. They just sat around talking about others. It was so sad. Sticks and dirt and rocks meant nothing to them. I remember how I used to play outside all day long n the summer. I have no idea what I did, but I loved it. Now don't get me wrong, there's the book readers verses outdoor kids among us everywhere, but the book readers used to be the exception to the other "normal" kids who played outdoors. Now the book readers remain still the exception and the majority being kids that struggle to play. The routine instead is coming home from daycare , where a tight schedule is created with minimal freeplay, supper, bath and bed. Where's the imagination encouragement?
I miss the concept of putting a kid in play clothes and letting them tear loose in the backyard mud. Now their polo might get dirty.
Sure I'm stuck in my own bias, I'll be happy to own up to that. I just wish I heard of more parents who play dressup with their kids instead of turn on the TV. I wish I saw evidence of more parents stacking blocks without needing to announce colors and shapes with Einstein movies in the background for their 9 month old. There is value in learning, but sometimes we can push too hard to grow a child up that we lose the joy of their current development. Sometimes splashing in the bathtub and mouthing toys is enough.
Hope I don't forget that any time soon.
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