Friday, September 29, 2006

Home




I found myself wandering through friends' websites this morning. I have found a few extra hours in which I have no pressing engagements and, quite frankly, can't think of anything that I should be "getting ahead" in. I read one particular article of my aunt Yvonne's reflecting on her experience in California. It was a joy to read and reflect on my personal joys about the trip.

As I was reading through her entry, immediately a quote from a dear friend, Harry, popped into my head; " So much of life is not done solo; its in teams or partners. So it's hard to decipher the impact of you."

It's funny. I woke up this morning to a quiet apartment. No agenda consumed my mind. No "hurry, get going" provoked my awakening. So I lay there for a minute. Soon two cats meowed their way into the room, faithfully reminding me of their state of starving. When their meows had turned to purrs through much petting, I resided to begin my day. Now I sit here with wet hair falling over my shoulders, fully seeing, fully wake, and with bagel in the toaster. Yet despite the music, quiet still surrounds me. Oh, what a refreshing break from life this morning has been. I am blessed beyond imagination. Yet, honesty stirrs within me. Quiet is only fun for a while and then I desire to share it with another. Independence is fantastic! As is independant dependance.

"So much of life is not done solo..."

I used to strive on my "away from life" times. I found such refreshment in them. I even began to look forward to them more than "busy in life" times. But it's like I woke up this mroning and my world had flipped. My mind asked "can my 'away from life' times still happen, just not solo?"

"Please." spoke my heart.


I pet Cheddar and Boots. Cats bring such stability in my life.
They are so familiar. So normal. So "home".


Home.



Home...

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Hassles and Trials are Temporary

This "school year" has begun at last. But I wish I could come to you on happier terms than those that this week has brought. To make the story quite short, storms have brewed in the Social Work Department for this cast away. Sadly, my punctured raft has failed to uphold the continual winds. But the good news is that a piece of driftwood has saved me at last. While help still remains on the horizon, the driftwood provides temporary relief from the stings of the ocean's salt.

In "English" terms (AKA, unfancy terms - my roommate would be so displeased with the prior statement since she was an English major. -) Nonetheless, it looks like I will be graduating in the Summer of this year as opposed to the Spring. Either way, nothing is set in stone until 2pm today and regardless of what happens my God is still merciful.

And... His timing is perfect.


On the other hand, I bring you an excerpt from today in class... "Look not on a single act of behavior, but a pattern of behavior."
Isn't it so easy to become frustrated with a storeclerks cold response, a friend's unloving words, or a mistake and then predetermine the person or the situation to be a failure? Maybe it's just me. But this sentence hit me this morning and rang of the mercy of my Savior. I am so blessed that not only does He not judge my life on one instance, but He also looks at my lifetime of effort and then even goes further to take into consideration that even if something fell completely through, my heart matters more than any outcome.

I wonder what it would be like if I dared to view every bad mood and every frustrating situation in light of it's temporary value instead of it's created hassle. (I seem to have forgotten to do that these past few days.)


Thank you, Lord, for the blessings and the trials.

You are a GREAT God!