Friday, November 27, 2009

A Finding

You know, I've found out some things over the past few days. First off, sacrifice can change you. It's odd how commentary from a stay-at-home mom about the difficulties of a full-time job can leave me securing some self-regulation. Funny how the emotions well up inside after pushing yourself through a tunnel, and in some ways surrendering to survive. It's so wild how much that changes your world. As I continue the countdown (15 work days left), it doesn't make the sting of the sacrifice any easier, but I find my knees hitting the ground in thanks that the tunnel's light is almost encompassing. And while the emotions may well themselves in my throat on occasion, I have realised that sacrifices may be common to man, but not interchangeable. Therefore, I am learning to find self-regulation amidst the honesty of the sacrifice. Again, a balance to be had.

I have realised some shortcomings in my ability to show Christ in the workplace. Some serious shortcomings. And that I look upon with regret as I begin my goodbye's. I know I have yet to reach perfection, but I can't help but wonder how much more of an example I could have been if I would have been more faithful amidst the storm. I make no excuse for my shortcomings, but look to better conquer the next trial - only through the harnessed power of Christ.

Enjoying the Thanksgiving break. Work was closed on Thanksgiving and today. Also have Monday off and am looking forward to being Matt's sidekick to Seminary. I figure the window frame of me tagging along is only narrowing and I would like to see what he experiences while I have the luxury. Besides, can't beat a good 5 hour round trip car ride with your best friend. Love that man. Love him, love him. Will be fun also to take Rachael on the excursion. She likes the long ride - we hope. =)

A deep sigh emerges as I think of the hard lessons that some friends are learning. Some are far from home and in search of home. Some are lost in emptiness. And some are just weighed down by situations beyond their control. My heart goes out to them. And better yet, my prayers. Hold fast, dear friends, Jesus is sufficient.

Well better get off this thing, Rachael's down for the night and I just can't pass up the chance to cheer Matt on in his PlayStation golfing attempts. Again, love that man. Love him so much.

Good night all those snuggling down for the night. Hope your thanksgiving has been a time of great family time and love. Rest in the assurance of Jesus. He is all we need. Praise be to God. Jesus is all we need.

- sending my love.

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