Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Communicating Worth


I have recently been reminded of the value of communicating worth in each conversation.

We've all been there: standing beside a person on the phone who just interrupted your conversation to "take this" obviously unpressing phone call. We get the "just a minute" hand motion. Or talking to someone and realising that they are just waiting for you to stop talking so they can continue to share their story. Or maybe it's the "I know you are dying to know all about me" people who never seem to ask you anything about your day.

It all boils down to expressing worth.

We want to feel valued in a mutual conversation. I want to feel like there is a reason to stand face-to-face, not so I can watch you text on your new iPhone. You value me being there. You want to spend time with me. And that's why you are here... and so am I.

I think we have endangered ourselves with the "I'm always available" age. If you can get ahold of me 24/7 that means whomever I am with needs to take a number. While certainly having access to Matt is a wonderful part of our day - sharing in silly signs that I have passed on my walk with the kids, or that random phone call to share what our crazy toddler just said. And yet there is an oddity and a distance that waiting causes in a relationship when "I just have to take this call" happens.

We've all done it and returned to the "now where were we?" moment. But I have been reminded once again that sometimes that moment has passed and static is left on the line.

It makes me evaluate how I communicate their worth to others when in a conversation. Rachael and Abi will always interrupt - they're not perfect- but I am communicating your worth to me by putting them on hold for you. I am saying, "I value you" by turning off the TV when you call. And I am saying, "You matter to me" by being present during our conversation.

The call can wait. The text can wait.

You matter.

I chose to be here with you.

- hope I can continue to make a conscious effort to be present ... in spite of life. =)

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