A Finding

You know, I've found out some things over the past few days. First off, sacrifice can change you. It's odd how commentary from a stay-at-home mom about the difficulties of a full-time job can leave me securing some self-regulation. Funny how the emotions well up inside after pushing yourself through a tunnel, and in some ways surrendering to survive. It's so wild how much that changes your world. As I continue the countdown (15 work days left), it doesn't make the sting of the sacrifice any easier, but I find my knees hitting the ground in thanks that the tunnel's light is almost encompassing. And while the emotions may well themselves in my throat on occasion, I have realised that sacrifices may be common to man, but not interchangeable. Therefore, I am learning to find self-regulation amidst the honesty of the sacrifice. Again, a balance to be had.

I have realised some shortcomings in my ability to show Christ in the workplace. Some serious shortcomings. And that I look upon with regret as I begin my goodbye's. I know I have yet to reach perfection, but I can't help but wonder how much more of an example I could have been if I would have been more faithful amidst the storm. I make no excuse for my shortcomings, but look to better conquer the next trial - only through the harnessed power of Christ.

Enjoying the Thanksgiving break. Work was closed on Thanksgiving and today. Also have Monday off and am looking forward to being Matt's sidekick to Seminary. I figure the window frame of me tagging along is only narrowing and I would like to see what he experiences while I have the luxury. Besides, can't beat a good 5 hour round trip car ride with your best friend. Love that man. Love him, love him. Will be fun also to take Rachael on the excursion. She likes the long ride - we hope. =)

A deep sigh emerges as I think of the hard lessons that some friends are learning. Some are far from home and in search of home. Some are lost in emptiness. And some are just weighed down by situations beyond their control. My heart goes out to them. And better yet, my prayers. Hold fast, dear friends, Jesus is sufficient.

Well better get off this thing, Rachael's down for the night and I just can't pass up the chance to cheer Matt on in his PlayStation golfing attempts. Again, love that man. Love him so much.

Good night all those snuggling down for the night. Hope your thanksgiving has been a time of great family time and love. Rest in the assurance of Jesus. He is all we need. Praise be to God. Jesus is all we need.

- sending my love.

Language

"A da" has various meanings to a 10 month old. If we're in the car it means she's talking to her feet. If the radio's on, it's singing and much more of a drawn out "a daaaaaaa." If it comes rapid fire it means Matt. If it's during play it means happiness. If she says it while on the bed looking over the edge it means "Dakota." Im not one of those Mothers who claims to have a genius (she's picking dog hair off the carpet and eating it), but I am enjoying her developing language.

I love the variety that pours out of a simple phrase. Ah the joy of a baby - a baby who's chewing on Dakota's Kong as I write this.

=)

Today and such

28 more working days left until I am DONE!!! - not that I'm counting or anything and not that it's in my scheduler written in red at the top of each day.-

My stomach's WAY off today. I wouldn't have come in but I knew they'd be short staffed today. So I sucked it up, despite dry heaves, and here I am (on my lunch break). This soup doesn't look or feel like it's going to sit too well.

Went in this morning to a pacifier smiler at 6:30am. Funny how nearly 12 hours of sleep has that blessed affect on her. There were no whines or tears, just all smiles. And bath time was joyous and all the more so when Rachael caught a glimpse of Dakota coming down the hallway. It was nice to have a happy morning, despite the dry heaves.

The white car is sick. $1200 dollars of sick. But we have found ourself yet again blessed by our friends to have borrowed a car from a friend for 2 weeks until the budget is passed at church and we find out if it makes sense to resurrect the family car or move on to something that may survive longer. We're enjoying the luxury of a van for the time being- and not only a van, but a van with a bunch of buttons and features. Way fun, you all, I love pushing the buttons.

Rachael started fake coughing after Matt or I cough the other day. So silly. And is ready for tooth #3 to pop in the top any day now. She's going through a bit of a snuggly mommy phase (no complaints) and is mobile and blabbering as ever before. She's trying to figure out how to say "uh-oh" and has "mama" and "dada" down.

Matt and I have started a gym membership in attempts to kill ourselves (HA!) and stay in better shape. Matt's goal will blow you away: to GAIN 25 pounds. Like SERIOUSLY! Cracks me up. But one of my favorite features of the gym in the movie theater with all the treadmills, bikes and elipticles. Talk about some good distraction. Thus far Rachael has done pretty well with the daycare part too - excluding the one time they ran the vaccum and they had to come get me because she lost it and wasn't getting it back.

How are you all? Hope your day is a good one.

A Little Lioness

Halloween was fun. We went over to the Thornells for some good candy pass-out bliss. We sat all bundled up on their front lawn surrounded by carved pumpkins and tea-light candle milk jugs. And the friends were fantastic as usual. Afterall, Jenney and me's like peas and carrots.

Mom (primarily) and I made the costume.